How I am since you have been gone:5 years

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Well Uncle Ozzie, it has been 5 years since you have left this world. In some ways I catch myself when I think about going to family gatherings and you are no longer there. Sometimes I wish I said more, saw you more….but even if I did everything I wish I had done I still would have found more that I wish I had done.

Pictures that nobody takes because that was your thing. We have all changed within the last 5 years. I hope that your proud of me.

I hate thinking about the hours that led up to saying good-bye.

The drive to the hospital, pulling up and seeing my grandmother waiting by the door.

The numbness I felt walking through the halls. Praying that a miracle would happen and that I didn’t have to say goodbye. I have always hated good-byes…it feels so final. Seeing you lying in that hospital bed and knowing that the man laying there wasn’t really you.

The only thing I could think to say as my last words to you, was that I loved you. I am glad that in the shock and numbness that I had even clarity to say those words.

5 years today. Has it really been 5 years?

You always thought to take the pictures, always wrote LOVE ME in our cards. The train gardens, and driving around to look at Christmas lights. Bear hugs and the threats of the tickle monster. To you squeezing my hand right before I walked down the aisle. Memories that I will take with me. Keep with me forever.

I am so thankful that I had you in my life, for the 22 years I had you in it.

I miss you.

Dear Lisa

I have already posted a post on Instagram and Facebook and yet for some reason I feel like the words I typed out are not enough. So here I am typing out a blog post.

You had a light about you. You were loving, kind, and you poured yourself into others. I know you never knew how much you meant to people, and I know that you had no clue of the impact you had on others. You loved Jesus, your family, your church…and while I don’t blame you and I am not mad that God took you too soon, because I know that His plans are not mine. Even as I try to wrap my mind around it all, I keep hearing you telling me to be kind to myself. I know it will hurt for a bit, but goodness the things that you have taught me! I don’t know if I can begin to count or recount all of those things. You seemed to see the “Me” that God intended me to be when I couldn’t see it. The cards, the texts, the hugs….there is just so many things over the few years I have had the joy of calling you friend on earth. To be honest if I can put one word to the feeling I have in this moment it’s lonely. Walking into Church today was one of the hardest things I have done in my life, I stared at the missions office hoping that if it truely were a bad dream you’d walk through. I could barely get through the hymns this morning because all I could picture is you singing the same songs in eternity in the presence of our Savior. 

You poured so much into; not just myself, but to so many people. I promise to try to be brave. I hope you’ll understand that I simply don’t feel so brave right now. I will try to be the Pastor’s wife you saw me as.  

Today when I got home, I got into my comfy clothes and I grabbed the coloring book you gave me simply because you saw it and it made you think of me. I colored for a bit and thought of all the good times. I smiled because sending cards or seeing something like a coloring book for someone was something you did. You were a giving person, you never asked for anything in return. 

I thought of how on Friday night, I was putting on the dramatics with the storm and the electricity out. I was home alone and had brought out an extra oil lamp and when I ran out of fire wood, I went out in the whirling wind to bring some in and then felt the need to have coffee. So of course I found a way to make coffee and I laughed to myself because I felt like I was in Little House On The Prairie. I couldn’t wait to tell you because I knew you’d laugh and find it funny. 

No matter how many tears are shed or how much I wish you were here for longer, you are home now. How can I possibly wish you back after all the beauty you are seeing. You are in such a better place and in time I will start to understand that. 

I love you my friend, you have left footprints on my heart and for that I will be forever thankful. See you soon!

Williamsburg Part 2 |Jamestown|

In the past few months have I really gotten to find a connection to Jamestown. Through studying my family and finding some of my relatives who had lived in Jamestown before settling in different parts of Virginia and Maryland. 

•Indian Village•   
    
    
   
The first part we walked through the Powhatan Indian Village. 

•The Dock•

   
    
   
These were the replica ships.

•The Fort•

   
    
    
    
    
 
The Fort that the English built and settled.

  After we did all of the outdoor museum, we went inside to go through the museum inside. 

To be continued….

~Brandy

Williamsburg Part 1 |Colonial Park • Busch Gardens|

  
Our vacation crew this year was Colin and I with Dan and Jen, and Colin’s sisters Maddy and Chloe. 

We were there for 6 days and while there were some hot days, we loved being down there. 

   
    
    
    
 
We also went to Busch Gardens. 

   
   
I also snapped a few shots from our last walk through the Colonial Park.

   
    
   
I love pink clouds! Don’t be surprised to see some of those cloud pictures in another post! 

To be continued…..

~Brandy 

4th of July

I am finally sharing my pictures from Independence Day! I hope you all who celebrated the holiday had a wonderful time with family and friends celebrating the freedom we have because of the brave! 

   
                         

~ Brandy

Frozen In Time

Would you like to know what I have on my handy flash drive? I am actually surprised I have been able to keep this secret for as long as I have. Mainly because I about exploded out of excitement when I found what I did. With any good secret there is always a story that goes with it. So I am just going to start of from the beginning and then you can join me in my excitement.

When my Uncle Ozzie and Aunt Diane passed away ( he passed January 2014 and she August 2014)there was the process of going through their things. My Uncle took not just a ton of videos, but a ton of pictures. I volunteered to sort through the pictures and video. When I sort, I mean sitting at my TV, at the laptop, going through disks and disks of pictures. I knew he had my Poppy’s WWII pictures and I started to look for them. I got very frustrated when I couldn’t find those pictures! I ended up popping a disk into my TV and didn’t just find those pictures but landed on the mother load of old family pictures! I was beyond excited to find these treasures. Blessed to have been able to put them on such a little device for me to have and pass on to my future babies… I will finally be able to have on of those old fashioned fireplace mantels filled with old pictures. I treat these like I’m Gollum and their the ring ( bonus points for you if you know what I am talking about!!) I want to share some with you. I have really gotten into looking into my family history and it’s been fun pointing faces with the names. With that said, I am going to be putting a watermark on the pictures I will be sharing and ask that you respect that these photos are not just mine but they belong to my family. Please don’t take any photo without my permission. Thank you!

Don’t you just love old photographs?! It is amazing to think that these are moments that are frozen forever. Makes me want to do better in taking pictures!
~ Brandy

A Letter To My Future Daughters ( If I am Blessed with Little Girls)

    I just came back home from seeing the movie Cinderella. First off I loved it1 The little girl in me loved seeing one of my favorite princess movies come to life on the big screen. Don’t even get me started on the dresses! I loved the message in the movie; Be Kind, Be Courageous. There was forgiveness, kindness, accepting who you are and hope in believing. I could not help but think that if I were to be blessed with daughters I want them to know not only to always be kind, and to willingly forgive others that have wronged them. But to know that they are loved and cherished.

Even though I don’t have any little girls (yet, Lord willing) I want to write this note for them. and even if I don’t ever have little girls, I pray this will bless you and your little girls.

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Dear Daughter(s),
I pray that you know how beautiful you are. That you are comfortable with who you are, no matter what anyone else thinks. You are a princess, not only in the eyes of your Mom and Dad, but in the eyes of a loving God who gave His Son to die in your place. I want to share with you my heart for you.

Always be kind. It doesn’t matter who you interact with, I pray that you will extend kindness to them. Even if they are mean to you, still treat them with kindness. It is hard, and there are going to be people who will treat you unkindly. That should never be your excuse to treat anyone with unkindness. The world we live in sadly encourages unkindness. There are going to be people who are different, believe differently, you may even disagree with someone. Still treat them with kindness. Even Jesus was kind to those who hated Him.

Always be brave. Being courageous is not always the easiest thing. Especially if you are scared. You are going to face trials, and seasons that will be scary. I pray that you will meet challenges head on with courage and grace. God will never allow you to go through anything that he doesn’t think you can handle. He will never abandon you nor will He forsake you.

Forgive those who do you wrong. It is hard to forgive those who have hurt you. However, forgiveness is a powerful thing. Jesus forgave those who crucified Him. Also forgive yourself. There may times where you have felt like you have failed, or let us down. You must not let Satan use it to hang over your head. Seek forgiveness and remember that God forgives you as well. Asking forgiveness is hard but it is worth it.

Marry not only for love, but marry someone who loves you for you. You were knitted together by God, and every bit of you was not an accident. I pray that you find someone who loves you for all you are. There is only one you and no one can take your place. The man that loves you for you, will not want to hide your light, will help you achieve your dreams, and will love you as an example of how Christ loves His bride. He won’t be perfect, and there will be dreams that may not play out the way you hoped. The man you are meant to spend the rest of your life will dry your tears and treat you like a queen. Treat him as a king. Love him for who he is, and the way God created him. Don’t seek to change him but learn to love him just the way he is. The way he was knitted together was not an accident either, and when God wrote his story who were already thought of. Trust God in your marriage, always!

Know you are worth much more then you think. You are a precious treasure. You have a place in this life. You are not only apart of my story or your dad’s story. You have your own story that God is writing. It may not look like you will have a happy ending some days, however if you put your trust and faith in God, happy ending’s are actually just the beginning of something wonderful.

You will always have your mom and dad who love you. As well as a God who loves you even more then you can ever imagine.

Love always, Mom

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I highly recommend the movie! It had some life lessons that are important, and it was nice to see a movie that was stunning. I hope you all have a wonderful night!

~ Brandy