How I am since you have been gone:5 years

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Well Uncle Ozzie, it has been 5 years since you have left this world. In some ways I catch myself when I think about going to family gatherings and you are no longer there. Sometimes I wish I said more, saw you more….but even if I did everything I wish I had done I still would have found more that I wish I had done.

Pictures that nobody takes because that was your thing. We have all changed within the last 5 years. I hope that your proud of me.

I hate thinking about the hours that led up to saying good-bye.

The drive to the hospital, pulling up and seeing my grandmother waiting by the door.

The numbness I felt walking through the halls. Praying that a miracle would happen and that I didn’t have to say goodbye. I have always hated good-byes…it feels so final. Seeing you lying in that hospital bed and knowing that the man laying there wasn’t really you.

The only thing I could think to say as my last words to you, was that I loved you. I am glad that in the shock and numbness that I had even clarity to say those words.

5 years today. Has it really been 5 years?

You always thought to take the pictures, always wrote LOVE ME in our cards. The train gardens, and driving around to look at Christmas lights. Bear hugs and the threats of the tickle monster. To you squeezing my hand right before I walked down the aisle. Memories that I will take with me. Keep with me forever.

I am so thankful that I had you in my life, for the 22 years I had you in it.

I miss you.

Published by

brandyrstrong

I am a 27 year old dreamer. Married to my husband and best friend Colin. I am mama to three fur-babies and dream of having some babies of my own. I love Coffee and Chai Tea, reading books and watching movies. I love DIY projects and baking. I love sand between my toes and the sound of the ocean. I love clean mountain air and being outdoors. I love my family and looking into their history. I am a follower of Jesus and love serving Him in my local Church. I am a lover of music and love pretty things.

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